Sunday, September 14, 2008

Do I Still Love Myself?

Careless. Careless. Careless. Dunno what I was thinking. Dunno what went thru my head. Dunno why I was distracted. All I knew was I felt myself kicking the pavement, cushioning my fall with my hands, doing a 3/4 flip-turn ala olympic-bronze-medal winning effort and landed flat on my ass.

First thing I saw was the half-dead tree staring back at me.

First thing that went thru my head was not "Shik*, how are my injuries / bleeding / abrasions / lacerations?"

No, that was not the first thing. That wasn't even the 2nd thing.

First thing that went thru my head was "Shik, did I scratch my Garmin?"
And I belek-belek my watch and heaved a huge sigh of relief when it all looked spiffy and OK. You see, injuries can heal, bleeding can be stopped. But a scratch on the watch is forever.

Immediately after that, I thought "Shik, did I tear my shoes?"

Looked down at my shoes and aside from some dirt and mud, they looked pretty fine too. That's when I saw my bleeding knee and some lacerations on my calf. OK la, sap sap sui... small stuff.

Dropped some red ink on the chicken legs

Brushed off some sand and dirt and continued home. Thank god home was 300m away. At the end of a 14km run. If it had been the start of the run, it would have been a real waste of a morning.

It didn't occur to me then, but as I showered, the thought hit me. I have read in frens' blogs about them crashing on their bikes and then the first thing that they think about after sitting up on the tarmac is "is my bike ok? is my bike ok?" Their own safety is put aside and its like they care more about their bike than themselves. At the time of reading, I thought to myself "That's crazy, how can anything material be more important than your own well-being?.... If it were me, I'd be looking at my injuries, and not my stuff.."

...And yesterday morning at about 8:25am, I joined the club. I just can't believe it.


At 1:03 PM, Anonymous Plum said...

Seriously though, what do you think about when you're doing those long solo runs?

All I ever think about is killing you.


Post a Comment

<< Home