Monday, September 22, 2008

Let Me Tell You A Story...

Once upon a time, in a far away land, not very long ago (yesterday), 3 lil stooges decided to go up a hill. They thought it would be nice to climb up the hill via bicycles... so they made an appointment to meet at the foot of the hill at 7:30am.

At 7am, stooge number 1 (let's call him Eugene) receives a text message from Stooge number 2 (let's call him Eric).
Eric: I might be late. Stuck in toilet.
Eugene: In toilet also can sms? Sure meh?
Eric: Can.. sit down only mah. Not like you so geng, cycle also can sms.. Hehe.
Eugene: #$%^&#@$&#$@

At 7.15am, Eugene texts stooge number 3 (Let's call him Jason)
Eugene: Is it raining there?
Jason: Federal here raining
Eugene: Heavy ah?
Jason: My urine more power la
Eugene: #$%&@#$%&*#@$

(Told ya they were 3 stooges)

So by the time Eric picked up Eugene and reached the foot of the hill, Jason was already fuming there for 45 mins. To cut a short story even shorter, they proceeded to cycle to the hill. This particular hill is called Peres. Some say that its a killer climb, some say its okay, while others think its a speed bump. Eric and Jason have climbed it before, but it was Eugene's first time.

For Eugene, it was like losing his virginity. All the anticipation, the building up of emotions, getting a hard on (in his legs), thrusting and working up a sweat and climaxing, but not really enjoying the full experience. Before he knew it, it was over. Done. And he couldn't recall what actually happened.

But he was addicted. Sucked into the enthralling experience of losing his virginity. He wanted more. So the other 2 stooges decided to 'entertain' Eugene's new found addiction of climbing up large boobs hills.

Off they went towards Tekala... going downhill from the top of Peres was smooth, with barely any effort required... Going up Tekala and towards the waterfall was pretty much smooth going too.. with loads of stops for photo-taking, cam-whoring and lepaking...

Nice view.... excellent ride

Stooge 3, Stooge 2, Stooge 1

Trying to look cool... keyword is trying

Pro rider and virginity-loser

After what seemed like eternity, and every one of them stooges decided that they had enuff photos to fill their Facebook account, they continued with their journey to Tekala waterfall.

Stopping at Tekala waterfall, the 3 tiring but cheerful stooges decided to refill their hungry tummies. Luckily there was a makcik with a drinks cum mee goreng stall who was ready to wield the big gigantic parang on the necks of the hungry and thirsty stooges.

Makcik (thinking inside): Muahahahaha... ni tempat tarak lagi 100 plus... ni mesti kena beli ngan i... boleh tutup kedai la lepas 'tiok' 3 budak ni.. (loosely translated as "Muahahahaha... this place no more 100 plus.. they have to buy from me... i can close stall and go home after i whack them kau-kau..)

What to do? 3 hungry and thirsty stooges under the 12pm sun. Eat grass meh? Ma buy 100 plus and mee goreng lor....

Chit-chatting a little and discussing where else to ride... they proceeded to ride towards a some more far away place called Kajang... probably they thought there was Kajang Satay being sold there at 1pm in the afternoon (stooges ma... dead tired alredi cannot think straight... luckily still can cycle straight)...

When it hit them that it was Ramadhan month and there would be no satay to be sold at 1pm, they were already at the junction to Kajang town... wat to do? Bloody hell U-turn back lor...

So they thought... no satay nevermind la... we go bathe at waterfall la.. By the time they reached the waterfall area again... they were thirsty again... Makcik still hadn't packed up yet and left for home (she's the smart one.. knowing full well that the 3 stooges would be back and asking for more 'tiok'ness)...

It looked like the 3 cyclists never learned their lesson. Piang!!! Kena big-ass parang one more time. Tired and lighter, both in body and wallet, the 3 stooges carried on to their next destination: Waterfall bath.

Syiokness ultimateness

Wait.. wait.. not yet refill bottle.. you wait your turn...

No... I don't wanna look.. no, don't take my photo.. I said NO!!

It was the BEST feeling ever!!! The cold heavy gush of water on a hot steamy day was heaven on earth!! It really made us wanna tackle Peres again... But luckily the 3 stooges were not that stupid. After the rejuvenating water session, the ride back to the foothill was slow and leisurely. Another bout of photo-taking took place at the Tekala dam.

Know why we didn't show our legs? Cos they're shaking, and we want the photo to be sharp.

Where the hell are the other 2??? Downhill also so slow..

OBVIOUSLY taking photos more important than riding

This one no better... rather snap than cycle

Panting like a dog on a sunny day

It looked like it was going to rain as the 3 exhausted cyclists reached the end of their ride... However the cyclo-meter only showed 95km and stooge number 1 had not done 100kms before! He was in agony! Only 5kms and he missed out on the 100km mark??? The other 2 stooges egged him on... asking him to put his big-ass back onto the bike and ride another 5km to round it up...

And so he did... 3kms to go, Father Rain peed on Eugene. Not a trickle mind you... Father Rain drank 50 liters of 100 plus and let it all go. Eugene was soaked to the skin in the last 3kms before reaching back to meeting point and ending up at 100.37km distance done.

All in all, the 3 stooges had a great time.

Ride specifics:

Actual Distance: 100.37km
Actual Ride Time: 4:20:13
Ave Speed: 23.1km/h
Max Speed: 68.4km/h
Calories burned: 3731 Cal


At 10:29 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

stooges 1, when you wanna do another round? hehe

At 1:14 PM, Anonymous allskoolguru said...

j'adore le vélo, je déteste mon travail ;)

At 9:25 AM, Blogger CapArnabBrand said...

Stooge 2: Quarter 2, 2009

allskoolguru: haha... put that on my bike ya..


Post a Comment

<< Home