Sunday, June 18, 2006

Home is Where the Pics Are

I'm back in my little home town of Teluk Intan, home to the leaning clock tower, fragrant biscuits and the famous chee cheong fun. Bet most of you have never seen the quaint little house that I grew up in, so this post will be more pics than words. And the photos are posted in no particular order, randomly taken walking around the house. Enjoy.

No hot shower for me when I grew up, mum said cold baths keep my horni-ness levels in check.

I USED to be real fit. Now I'm just plain fat.

I did ask my dad for an escalator when I was a kid; he told me, "Go ask your mother." Mum was in one of her moods, I guess I forgot to ask.

Mum's making spaghetti. She's an excellent cook who never goes by the book. I blame her for my 39" waist. That means I love your cooking mum.

Now, is that a porsche sitting in the porch?

Typical Chinese home. Feng Shui stuff, deities and scattered furniture.

10:00am and he's still snoring away. My bro's such a pig when he comes home.

An outdated family portrait. You don't actually believe I was gonna let you see how fat I was, did you? Yeap, those are my family jewels.

Alright folks. Thats all for today. Lunch time, spaghetti time. Cheerios!

Wednesday, June 14, 2006

I Lost My Fatt

Someone stole my fatt. Yes, someone stole my luck. They came in the middle of the night and they snuck my 8 away.

And as I was left without my fatt (eight), I had it really bad yesterday.....

First, I nearly crashed my car. Didn't notice the car in front stopped abruptly on Motorola bridge; instinctively I swerved into the slow lane without even having time to see whether there was any car there. And since you're reading this, yes.... there was no car. Thank the Lord.

Second, I accidentally honked at the same car in front TWICE, for no reason. He must have been cursing me under his breath as everybody else was looking at the both of us.

Third, I scratched my tires and my rims slightly on the kerb as I was parking the car. Never happened before. My parking skills are numero uno bar none.

I suppose I should be lucky he/she/it didn't take the other 8. If not, things could have been way worse. I cannot even begin to imagine.....

Monday, June 12, 2006

A Walk to Remember

Woke up this morning, threw back the covers and turned over to look at the time.... 7.40am. Damn, Monday again??!!? How did the weekend fly by so fast?? The start of another week, sheesh.. another work week.... But wait. What work week? I have NO job! Ahahahahahahaha..... With my spirits soaring, I jumped out of bed, got to the window and took in the fresh air. Monday mornings are great. Ha.

Well, since I was already awake, may as well go lap it up at the pool. Nice pool we have at my place, resort style and as it was a Monday morning; i had it all to meself...

Did 30 laps, went back upstairs, showered and got myself a mug of steaming hot milo.... ahhhh..

It was then that I decided to take a walk out to buy the papers, it was after all a BEAUTIFUL MONDAY morning.... ahahahha...

There's this bookstore just across the road, walking there and back takes maybe what.. 10 mins? A leisure stroll to start off the day. Walking out of the main entrance, I waved at the guards, greeted them good morning and whistled as the birds up in the tress sang their hearts out... oh yes, it was a lovely Monday morning.

Leaving the condo behind, i crossed the road.... to get to the other side.

Bloody hell. The bookstore was closed. Shit. Is it closed on beautiful Monday mornings? Or is it just not open yet? The only other place to get papers is 7-11, which is like a marathonian 1.36km away. Should I stay and wait? Or should I go? Decisions. Decisions.

After contemplating for a full 3 seconds, I decided to take the 1360m walk. After all, it was a splendid Monday morning! And I had a nice view to keep me company....

Along the way, I walked on pavements.....

and I walked on roads.....

After 5 minutes, 7-11 was still nowhere in sight. Sigh, this just doesn't feel right. No turning back now neways.

And so I plodded on. My feet said NO, but my mind said GO. Thankfully, I have immensely strong willpower.... and it was a superb Monday morning!

Finally, after what seemed like eternity.... there you are!

Bought my papers, I read The Star btw.... lingered inside the store for a while, air-con felt like Nirvana... and then started on my trek home....

........... {10 mins pass} ......

No shit. Bookstore is open. Should have just waited for a while at one of them benches there.

Sometimes the decisions you make, affect the way your life pannes out. Trust me, the next time you ponder over something, take more than 3 seconds to do so.

Friday, June 09, 2006

T(hursday) G(o) I(ndulge) (at) Fridays

Once upon a time, not too long ago, in a dainty little town; there were 2 rabbits, Brer Rabbit and Bra Rabbit (guess I don't have to tell you which is the Alpha-male). They met, they talked, they dated, they loved each other and finally got together on the 8th of June 1998.

{Fast forward to the present}

Yesterday, Thursday, 8th June 2006; Brer Rabbit and Bra Rabbit decided to celebrate their 8th anniversary at TGI-Fridays.

Being the lovey-dovey bunnies that they were, they decided to share the set menu, consisting of a starter, a main course and dessert. On top of that, they added a side order of mushrooms. Yes, these bunnies are not your standard I-love-carrots bunnies; they're a new breed of rabbits with omnivorous tendencies.... and some alcoholic preferences. That explains the ultimate mudslide Brer Rabbit chose.

Bra Rabbit wanted some 'wild' starters, so she decided on the Fiery 3 Chilli Calamari. Yes you heard that right, rabbits do eat seafood; they just don't do it that often. The calamari came together with the order of mushrooms, portabello mushrooms coated in batter and deep-fried. Lip-smackingly goody good good.

Brer Bunny and Bra Bunny started tucking in. Brer dude was kinda well-mannered in his eating habits early on (no doubt trying hard not to look like the fat lard of a bunny he is); but as the meal progressed and the alcoholic mud slowly numbed his senses, his fork punched the helpless squids in between his rabbit teeth at a rate of 5 squids per minute. Before long, the plates were polished clean... Then the citrus fillet arrived.

A slab of dory fillet in citrus juice, some rice with a tinge of turmeric and measly microwaved broccoli filled the plate. Brer Bunny thought it was a let-down after the initial taste-bud tantalising starters. So Brer Rabbit refused to comment about the main dish.

For dessert, Bra Rabbit picked the double-choc fudgie brownie, topped with vanilla ice cream and laced with chocolate sauce and caramel. Yummy yum yum. However, both the bunnies were already filled to the brim of their little tum-tums (maybe the brer's tum's not so little, but that's another story altogether), and they only managed to nibble a coupla bites of the brownie.

And that was the end of the feasty fiesta, celebrated on the 8th anniversary to the day Brer Rabbit hooked up with Bra Rabbit.

And yes, even after 8 years, romance isn't dead. Bra Rabbit came home to sweet-smelling roses.
Whether Brer Rabbit got any action that night, you decide how this fairy tale ends.

The End.

Wednesday, June 07, 2006

Heavy Rain + Lots of Cars = 06/06/06

What is it about KL and traffic congestions? Is it the lack of roads? The volume of vehicles? The attitude of the drivers? I suppose its a killer combo of all that and more. Roadworks, rain, faulty lights, blah blah blah.... and more rain, and more roadworks, blah blah..

And I had to get caught in one of 'em jammies on Tun Razak yesterday evening. It was pouring and every damn fella behind the wheel was impatient in gettin home (incl yours truly). Some to catch the 7pm show. Some to have a quickie with their mistress. And others like me with more basic needs, get food into the tum-tum.

Visibility was poor. Bikes were weaving in and out. I was having real trouble concentrating on the road and whipping out my trusty camera phone at the same time. Haha... started snapping away at the cars and shops. Just too bad I couldn't get the pained expressions of the other drivers caught in the crawl.

At times, it was just plain standstill. Time seemed like eternity.

And when we got started again, we inevitably stopped after 15 metres. And start, and stop. And start and stop. Another 3 metres. And another 5. And stop. Took me all of 1 hr; 13 mins; 21 secs to reach the Kesas exit from KLCC carpark.

I was finally relieved to be able to step on the gas, when out of no f@#%ing where, this f@#%ing dude cuts into the lil f@#%ing space right in front of me. Brakes slam, horn honks, curse flows. F@#%ing dude swerved again in front of me as if to f@#%ing taunt me and cuts into the other lane. Had a good mind to chase him down and f@#%ing slap him silly, but a grunting tummy means getting home pronto takes priority.

I don't f@#%ing give a damn who you are. We all have a home to go back to. Not just you.

Sunday, June 04, 2006

The Feats of Feet

With the World Cup barely a week away, I find it fitting to take this opportunity to chronicle the career of one of football's greatest to never have showcased his skills at the world cup.

Born in a shanty town the year after Mario Kempes won the World Cup for the Argentines in 1978, he never looked like he had the attributes of a footballing great. Short and stodgy, and not blessed with electrifying pace, he was never going to be the next Henry or Ronaldo. However, there was something in the way he kicked a ball, that made you want to just sit and watch.

When just a kid, he used to spend his evenings playing football barefooted in the field next to his home, juggling the ball, doing quick turns, passing against the wall, he honed his skills the hard way, on a prickly sandy field, unlike the young superstars of footballing academies.

At the age of 10, in a school game, the young prodigy was hovering around the penalty area when the ball was played to his feet. With a quick turn, he put the ball through the goalkeeper's legs and into goal. As his teammates mobbed and congratulated him, he knew then that he was destined for a life of football.

Barefooted games gave him the knack and touch of the ball naturally and he played with a panache and touch unsurpassed in a boy so young. When he was 14 and missed an important game against his class rivals for being grounded by his mother, his class teacher ranted at him for failing to turn up at the game, causing his team to lose by a solitary goal. His team needed him, so his teacher said, needed him, the 'attacking machine', as he was fondly dubbed.

At 15, he finally got his first real pair of boots, and he took his game to another level. He played regularly for his age group and averaged a goal a game. He didn't have the pace, or explosive acceleration some of his teammates had, but like his idol, Brazillian captain Rai, he had a footballing brain.

His first touch was excellent, his vision for the pass unrivalled. He wasn't your typical wide man dribbler, but he could with a feint and drop of his shoulder beat his marker with ease. He was quite dependent on his right foot, but with a touch so assured, he always had time to switch to his stronger side to play the final ball. His composure in front of goal was legendary, when one-on-one with the keeper to beat, you could bet your life savings he would score, and he never failed.

At age 18, he was regularly playing outside his age group, with players more physically intimidating and with more experience. However, he was never to be outshone and still averaged a goal every other game. By the time he was 20, he had the footballing world at his feet.

And he never let up. However, fate dealt him a cruel blow. In pre-season training in 2004, he ruptured his cruciate ligament and cartilage in his left knee after an innocous fall. Rehabilitation left him out for the whole season as he struggled with fitness and weight gain.

By the end of 2005, he was back to playing regularly, but he was never back to his best. The years of strain and knocks had taken their toll and with the career threatening injury, he struggled to regain his form. At the age of 26, when most footballers find their peak, his career was free-falling.

Then, in March 2006, in a friendly game, he twisted his knee just as he was about to turn his marker. Trying to put the pain behind him, he carried on and managed to score another 2 goals in the game where his team ran out winners. A post-game MRI scan revealed another cartilage tear in his previously injured left knee and he had to undergo the surgeon's knife again.

His orthopaedist advised him to give up the game to prevent an even more debilitating syndrome in his later years; osteoarthiritis. At age 27, his career over just before the start of the World Cup in Germany. He could have been there with the likes of Ronaldinho and Beckham, pushing their respective teams towards glory. But here he is, forced to sit out and watch the games from the sidelines. An early demise to the career of one of the most naturally gifted players to ever touch a football.

And his name, you ask?