Thursday, June 30, 2005

Vitamin C

I was on the way home after dinner yesterday with my fiancee (lets call her J) when she got an sms telling her that gingko biloba is good for memory and horsetail is great for skin and hair. Now, if you have not heard of the above stuff, you should hang out more often at Watson's or Guardian's supplements section. Yes its true. There's more to supplements than plain ol' vitamins A to Z. Alright, back to the topic...

So J leans over to me and says:

J: When we get home, I'm gonna take some EPO.. (thats evening primrose oil btw)
Me: You sure forget one after a few days... always also like that wan la you..
J: Where got? I everyday got take one la.

And that got me thinking. And thats unusual, cos I've never been much of a thinker all my life.

Me: Btw, there's a 'supplement' thats good for everything.
J: Wazzat?
Me: Vitamin C.
J: Flavettes?
Me: Vitamin Chocolate.

Yeah baby! Chocolate! The one thing in this world that's great for EVERYTHING... A chocolate a day, keeps the blues away. A chocolate a day, keeps the stress at bay. What more could you need?


My week's supply of happiness

You know, I've even read somewhere that having chocolates is akin to having sex. Great sex at that. And the plus side is, there's no STD risk involved. You can have it anytime, anywhere. You can have it in the kitchen, in the living room, hell, you can even have it in the office... in front of your boss. And your lady boss at that. And she's gonna wanna have it too! You can have it 3 times a day and nobody's gonna call you a maniac. And you don't even need to get your girl in the mood to have it. Now, is any one of you gonna disagree with me?

I've yet to come across anybody who doesn't like chocolates. J, she loves em. My bro, he loves em. I love em. And I don't care whether they're white or black (in this case dark); bars or balls; with nuts or without... as long as they're of the 'cukulek' family.

Diamonds are a girl's best friend. Mine's chocolate.

Monday, June 27, 2005

Boring Boring Monday

I'm bored. Bored to death. Shit bored. I've never been so bored in my life. Ok fine, I could have been boreder before, but I don't remember. I feel like this is the mostest boringest boring afternoon ever. I'm so bored, I don't even care about my grammar. So don't complain.

I'm in office, listening to the strains of Iris (goo-goo dolls) from my pc; browsing web pages and drinking boiled water from my plastic canister. Office doesn't feel cold enough to be cold, and not warm enough to be warm. So I got nothing to complain to maintenance. Hell, I've got nothing to complain. This IS boring!

Immediate boss on mc, his immediate boss is nowhere to be seen, my colleagues are "snaking" somewhere, and I'm all alone here with nothing to do. I mean, I could find something to do if i REALLY wanted to, but what the heck, its Monday right? Mondays are not for working. Tuesdays neither. Workweeks should start on a Wednesday, and make it a half day cos its been a long weekend. Thursdays are ok for a full day cos work needs to be done right? And Fridays can be half days too... to get ready for the long weekend. Now wouldn't that be nice.

Man. This is killing me. I feel like i'm in a rut. Wonder if this is what men go thru in a mid-life crisis. Paunch starts growing, hair starts losing, worries increase and zest decrease. No shit. That sounds just like me. And what do men do when they go thru that phase? They go out and buy a sports car. Heheh, me? I think i'll have to settle for the die cast models.

Another 2 hours plus to go. Toliet breaks = 32 mins, tea break = 57 mins, lepak at other cubicles = 41 mins. Think thats gonna be the plan for this afternoon. Yeap, that should about cover it. Anything, call my mobile. I won't be at my place. And if I dun pick up, i'm having my toilet break.

*Flush*

Saturday, June 25, 2005

Prelude to MR Too's 18(0)-SX Review

I'm currently driving an Is(upra)wara. Not any Iswara mind you. Mine's got a transplanted 1498cc engine, open pod filter, straight flow exhaust, short shifter and 15" rollers shod with Ziex Falken rubbers. And this baby's been serving me well on the open roads since 1997.

I've had loads of wonderful memories in my baby. Some notable ones include smoking an old lady in a beat-up kancil and tailgating an '86 Saga with huge red coloured P's emblazoned all over the car. Oh I've had my fun...

But the only constant in life is change. We change our hairstyles, we change our clothes, our underwear (some ppl i know go quite a while without changing, but that's a different story altogether), we change jobs *wink wink* and now i'd like to change my ride.

Now now. Don't come telling me bout how the "Potong Sawi" is built like a tank or how the Maivee has DVVT. And dude(u know who u are), don't tell me bout swedish marques either. I've been lookin' around, doing my fair share of research, oogling AND googling and I have finally compiled my shortlist of possible replacements for my Proton Iswr 1.5 ABS POJ*

SHOW YOURSELVES !!!

In no particular order:

Honda Prelude DOHC VTEC


Nissan 180SX


Toyota MR2

Whoa. *Siau liau la. Ahn chua keng? Kaliau pun aneh sui* Directly translated from my mother tongue to mean "crazy alredi la. how to pick? all aso so biutifool."

Maybe I can get you ppl to vote or maybe I can organize some form of contest thingy here.

Pls pick your favourite car from the list below and complete the slogan:

(A) Honda Prelude
(B) Nissan 180SX
(C) Toyota MR2

(Complete the slogan in not more than 15 words)
Eugene looks so good in my choice of car above because ...........................

Send your entries to hesohot@ohmygod.com before 31st December 2005. If your choice matches Eugene's buy and your slogan is judged to be the best, you win a ride in Eugene's much touted Proton Iswr 1.5 ABS POJ* before it is sold to the highest bidder. 1st 5 entries received will win a limited edition autographed photo of Eugene posing with his ride.

Judge's decision is final and no correspondence will be entertained.

Vrooooooom!

*ABS POJ = A Bit Squeaky Piece Of Junk

Friday, June 24, 2005

Irony

I post about my inability to consume even minimal amounts of alcohol, and a friend of mine (who by the way doesn't know about my blog) conveniently fwds me a mail about drinking. Its a good read by the way, but its still not gonna make me go buy a couple of pints on the way home.

"Sometimes when I reflect back on all the wine I drink I feel shamed. Then I look into the glass and think about the workers in the vineyards and all of their hopes and dreams If I didn't drink this wine, they might be out of work and their dreams would be shattered. Then I say to myself, "It is better that I drink this wine and let their dreams come true than be selfish and worry about my liver." ~ Jack Handy ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
"I feel sorry for people who don't drink. When they wake up in the morning, that's as good as they're going to feel all day. " ~Frank Sinatra ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
"When I read about the evils of drinking, I gave up reading." ~ Henny Youngman
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
"24 hours in a day, 24 beers in a case. Coincidence? I think not." ~ Stephen Wright ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
"When we drink, we get drunk. When we get drunk, we fall asleep. When we fall asleep, we commit no sin. When we commit no sin, we go to heaven. So, let's all get drunk and go to heaven!" ~ Brian O'Rourke ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
"Beer is proof that God loves us and wants us to be happy." ~ Benjamin Franklin
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
"Without question, the greatest invention in the history of mankind is beer. Oh, I grant you that the wheel was also a fine invention, but the wheel does not go nearly as well with pizza." ~ Dave Barry ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
To some it's a six-pack, to me it's a Support Group. Salvation in a can! ~ Dave Howell
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
And saving the best for last, as explained by Cliff Clavin, of Cheers. One afternoon at Cheers, Cliff Clavin was explaining the Buffalo Theory to his buddy Norm. Here's how it went: "Well ya see, Norm, it's like this... A herd of buffalo can only move as fast as the slowest buffalo. And when the herd is hunted, it is the slowest and weakest ones at the back that are killed first This natural selection is good for the herd as a whole, because the general speed and health of the whole group keeps improving by the regular killing of the weakest members. In much the same way, the human brain can only operate as fast as the slowest brain cells. Excessive intake of alcohol, as we know, kills brain cells. But naturally, it attacks the slowest and weakest brain cells first. In this way, regular consumption of beer eliminates the weaker brain cells, making the brain a faster and more efficient machine. That's why you always feel smarter after a few beers."

Cheers !!!

1 Bloody Mug

"Duk" "Duk" "Duk" "Duk" ... Ponding in the beck of my head just wouln't stop. Flushed face. Heavy breating. Feel like dying. What fom of ancient and medieval torture is tis??

- a bloody mug o' beer.

That right. One measly (to most pepole) mug robbed me of my precioussss sleep for the hole damn hot and sweaty night. And now I'm in ofice, looking like a zombie and feling like jumping off the 2nd flooor, thru the pantry window, straight into the gutter. I guess you can see by now, I can't drink (as in alocohol). That mug there last nite musta have been more alcohol than I've ever consumed in my entire life prior. Isit hot in here? Or is it just me?

Btw, what's it about a bitter-tasting "western chinese tea" that poeple just keep coming back for more? I can never unnerstand (and I think I nvr will). Gimme a tall galss of fresh orange juice anyday, anytime.

And, anybody knows any hangover cures? DOes my condition nwo after a single mug qualify as a hangoover? Don't think i'll ever take another swig of beer again. Gotta jot this down, my next year's wedding dinner's gonan be free flow of teh o' ais limau.


p/s - somebody just told me my spelings all wrong. i dun care.

Thursday, June 23, 2005

- Youth -

This is one of my favourite pieces from way way back when I was still in primary school. Sorry I forgot who wrote it, but whoever you are, its a GREAT piece. Think its Tennyson...<scratching head> but I can't bet my balls on it. My Std 4 English teacher shared it with me, and here I am, sharing it with all of you....

Youth is not a time of life; it is a state of mind. It is not a matter of rosy cheeks, red lips and supple knees, it is a matter of the will, a quality of the imagination, a vigor of the emotions; it is the freshness of the deep springs of life.

Youth means a temperamental predominance of courage over timidity of the appetite, for adventure over the love of ease. This often exists in a man of 60 more than a boy of 20. Nobody grows old merely by a number of years; we grow old by deserting our ideals.

Years may wrinkle the skin, but to give up enthusiasm wrinkles the soul. Worry, fear, self-distrust bows the heart and turns the spirit back to dust.

Whether 60 or 16, there is in every human being’s heart the lure of wonder, the unfailing childlike appetite of what’s next and the joy of the game of living. In the center of your heart and my heart there is a wireless station: so long as it receives messages of beauty, hope, cheer, courage and power from men and from the Infinite, so long are you young.

When the aerials are down, and your spirit is covered with snows of cynicism and the ice of pessimism, then you are grown old, even at 20; but as long as your aerials are up, to catch waves of optimism, there is hope you may die young at 80.


Grampy & Grammy, this is for you!

Love & kisses,
*Your fav grandson*

Wednesday, June 22, 2005

(Good?) Movies Galore

Its one of those times again. Loads of eagerly awaited movies screening at the same time (or almost). And i've been a bit delayed in catching up. Hell, I only managed to watch Sepet last night, on VCD (wonder if my fren bought the CD from Jason Lee Siau Loong ;-) ) Neways, Sepet was good; 1st Malay movie I watched from beginning to end (including credits). And if all local productions are like this, I'd watch a couple more. Btw, any of you think Jason (watzis real name?) looks like Jordan Chan?

Okies, back to new screenings. I'm gonna catch Batman Begins tonight. Been hearing rave reviews of Christian Bale and the storyline. Can't wait; hope the hype lives up to its billing. Saw HG2G a couple of days back. Funny in its own quirky way. Marvin's a riot. Manic-depression lil robot. I'm sure many of us can relate to him.
Haven't seen Mr and Mrs Smith yet. Caught the trailer tho; and the only thing I remember bout it is Jolie and Jolie and Jolie. How can anybody in this world have so much sex appeal oozing out of every pore? Don't even get me started.

Coming soon: Fantastic Four, Initial D and War of the Worlds.
Its a babe-fest in GSC in the next few weeks! (By the way, 95% of movies I watch at GSC... best popcorn money can buy)
Jessica Alba can be Fantastic all on her own (ditch the other three losers..); Anna Suzuki takes the limelight away from Toyota Trueno (btw, did they pick Anna because of her name?) and Katie Holmes tonight... errr... I'll just leave her to lil Tom. And Jolie... Jolie. I can't wait.

Saturday, June 18, 2005

Dunking Durians

Last night we were out and about town,
It was so late, that your mama would frown,
And then we saw, the fruit with the crown,
Stopped by the stall, and from the car we got down.


The Durian Stall

She asked for 5, and thats what we got,
But I believed, we could eat the whole lot,
From bitter to sweet, we had them sort,
Tho' manners forgotten, slurp we did not.


1 by 1, waiting for their turn..

Fleshy and good, and gooey and creamy,
We satisfied ourselves, with a look so dreamy,
And coupled with weather, so hot and steamy,
Everything was just right, pure yummy yummy.


mmmm.... yummy yummy..

Sitting by the road, at a makeshift stall,
And illuminated by, the streetlamp so tall,
Just the 2 of us, we were having a ball,
Everything forgotten, just enjoying it all.


"on my side of the table means MINE!!"

Cleaned them bare, we left nothing to waste,
It wasn't about greed, it was cos' of taste,
But I must admit, that eating in haste,
I kinda got some, plastered over my face.


polished clean....biji botak..

It was all over, before we knew it,
5 biji durian, sudah kena eat,
Look at my tummy, from where I sit,
More running next week, oh dammit!


we hate to admit it, but it wasn't all ours..

10 ringgit was all, that we had to pay,
Wiped our butts, and we're on our way,
For the short drive to the home we stay,
And it was a perfect end, to a long long day....


and after it all... Nirvana !!!

Thursday, June 16, 2005

The Rock

Tis the biggest event in my life for 2005... gettin engaged to the only girl that I would ever need for the rest of my life. *muaks* I'm a bit late in announcing to the world, but better late than never. Yeap, I did get down on my creaky knees, and yeap, I did do the lengthy-lengthy speech thing, and yeap, there were some soppy moments ala "hold me like you did in Naboo", and yeap.... she (finally) agreed. :-)

And the symbol of our engagement? Tada.... (drumroll)



The Rock

Ok fine, the pic is a bit blurry; but thats the only pic I have (for now). Might post some gleamier (got such word ah?) and shinier pics when I have the opportunity. Maybe snap some pics of her fingers when she's sleeping... heheh.

So, I got another date to remember now, to add on to the birthday, anniversary, father-in-law's (to be) birthday, mother-in-law's (to be) birthday, etc..etc.. I'm not much good at remembering dates, except for the FA Cup final and the Champions League Final; so its gonna be a challenge for me.... maybe I should just post the date here, and one of you can send me a reminder next year. *Phiak* (Slap on head, turn around and see her standing there with her hands on her hips)... woooops.

Haven't decided on the wedding date yet... and the theme for the wedding. She wants something traditional and classy, I want a beach party where all the girls turn up in bikinis... guess we'll have to sit down and flip a coin... or play rock, paper & scissors. Best 2 out of 3 wins. I hope I get it my way (rubbing hands in glee and anticipation).

Neways, now that i'm off the market, I'd like to take this opportunity to apologise to Ms ABCD, Cik EFGH, Mrs IJKL and Datin MNOP for spurning your repeated advances over the last couple of years. I wish you all the best; and I'm sure you'll find the right one someday.

Peace.

Wednesday, June 15, 2005

Dinner Dilemma

Everyday at about the same time, I find myself having to make the single most difficult decision fo the day: What to eat tonight??? You know, I can make decisions like slashing budgets, buying property and getting engaged.... but come dinner time, i'm stumped.

A typical evening conversation with my girl goes like this...
Me: Eat what tonight?
My Girl (MG): Dunno, u decide.
Me: Lunch u eat what?
MG: Chap fan (economy rice/nasi campur to the uninitiated), what u had?
Me: Cafe crap
MG: So eat what?
Me: Uh, dunno la. U think leh?
MG: Tired of thinking, u decide la. Anything la.
Me: Uh, late already la, dun wanna eat until too full.
MG: Ok.
Me: So eat what ha?
....... and it goes on and on.... (5 minutes later we both end up eating bread with jam at home, washed down with a glass of boiled water)

I just dunno why its soooooo difficult. I mean, we're basically spoilt for choice; this country we live in is like a food haven - Char Koey Teow, Chicken Rice, Nasi Kandar, Nasi Beriyani, Satay, Pasta, Fastfood (note that I listed out all the fattening and oily stuff - me favourites :-D ) and the list goes on.... My peeps up there from Penang know what i'm talking about...


Is it just me? Or do you people out there go through this routine also? Me... i'm still undecided what to have later. Guess i'll just settle for tosai telur and teh tarik; but then again, I had teh tarik during lunch.......

Tuesday, June 14, 2005

Multitaskingitis

Think i'll call in sick... for the rest of my life. I'm down with the dreaded disease - "Multitaskingitis"

Medical journals report that approximately 99.9% of the world's population are stricken, and I think I may have caught the bug at a tender age....
(cue to rewind to 1979)

It must have been hovering in the air, in that stuffy little maternity ward, in that run-down building in downtown Ipoh. 1st breath of air and down it went into my bod, where it lay dormant for a couple of months. I first showed symptoms at about 3 months; when I started to drink milk AND pee at the SAME time.

(fast forward to the present)

Look around you, there's the guy who talks on his mobile, chews on a chocolate bar, walks (and possibly farts) all at the same time. There's the girl who writes in her diary, while applying lip gloss and scratching her toe using her other toe. I mean... is that efficient utilization of body parts or what?

You know, if there was a Mr Multi-Tasking Competition, we'd all be serious contenders for the title. So, let me share my capabilities here, stuff that I can do at any 1 time without batting an eyelid, in order of increasing difficulty:-

1. nod my head and talk (i do that all the time with my boss)
2. drive and talk (okay, everybody i know does that)
3. eat and talk (inaudible at times, but it counts)
4. swim and talk (obviously to myself)
5. pee and talk (obviously NOT to myself)
and the mother of all multi-tasking abilities
6. sleep and talk.

nuff said.

Welkum to mai laif

I dunno whether i'm walking down the right path.... was going "to blog or not to blog, that is the ... " you get the drift. Well, we'll see whether I can keep this up, whether I can keep this honest-to-goodness story telling of my life going, whether I can keep sharing the juicy bits of my sleazy-weazy life with public, whether.....
(heaves a huge sigh and rolls eyes upward)

Note this moment: 14/06/2005 18:52:27, I take my plunge into the deep end of the blogging pool - will I survive or will I not? (ominous music in the background) That's for me to try (or fry) and for you to find out.

...... to be continued.